I Want Donald Trump To Be President


As you know, the Donald has thrown his hat in the ring for a Presidential bid.  It’s quite the first step as he dives head first into the deep end of the political waters instead of getting his feet wet with a smaller position.  If nothing else the Presidential race just got a whole lot more interesting.  I for one really want Donald Trump to become President.  My reasons for wanting him in the Oval Office have absolutely nothing to do with politics or his views.  Here are my reasons for wanting Donald Trump to be the next POTUS.


This Guy Is Borderline Wealthy


Seriously, the guy is worth anywhere from $4 billion to upwards of $10 billion depending on who you listen to.  Either way, the guy has Lannister money.  Now many people look at this and say things like “that means he’s out of touch” or “he doesn’t understand the common man”.  Well, yeah but who do you want?  Joe Jerkoff the plumber running the country?  I want someone that is successful in life and given the choice between a businessman and a lawman (or woman), give me the businessman every single day of the week.  After all, the US is basically a giant company.


On top of that, people are always concerned about politicians catering to the lobbyists that line their pockets and finance their campaigns.  The word corruption is thrown around quite often.  Well how do you buy off a guy that’s already a billionaire?  Donald already has money, he doesn’t need other people’s.  I’m not totally naive, I’m sure he has certain people that he’ll owe favors to along the way but don’t you want a candidate that isn’t completely in debt to corporations that have their own interests in mind?


Pure Entertainment Value


Politics is boring as hell.  Everyone is terrified of saying anything honest for fear of it being taken out of context or offending a group that might vote for them.  It’s benign drivel and people that are religious about it need to get lives.  Listening to politicians walking on eggshells and reading a carefully scripted speech off a teleprompter is like watching paint dry.

The State of the Union is supposed to be a blockbuster and it’s the same BS every year.  The country sucks and the President’s plan will bring it back but at the same time the country rocks and it’s all because of what the President has done so far, yada yada yada.  The President’s party stands up and applauds every 30 seconds or so while the opposing party sits down looking angry and unimpressed.  It’s inauthentic and tiresome.


Insert Donald Trump.  He clearly doesn’t care about offending anyone and will say whatever the hell he feels like.  I want to hear his State of the Union address.  Forget the church-like routine of standing up and down, I want people confused.  How great will it be watching people awkwardly try to figure out if they should applaud while everyone in attendance has a puzzled look on their face.  The debates will be amazing.  Instead of the generic cookie cutter politicians stammering their way through their responses you’d get this idiot babbling, going on tangents and flat out bullying people as though he’s still on The Apprentice.  I want need to see this!

It’s Time For Someone From New York City to Take Control


It’s really simple, New York City is the captial of the world.  It’s the most international city on the planet, it’s the financial epicenter of the global economy and it’s the county’s most populated city.  Not only that, the NYC metropolitan area is the 2nd largest population wise in the entire world.  Why then have we not had a representative in the White House since FDR?

Donald Trump owns half of New York City, the guy is as much of an NYC figure as anybody.  To paraphrase Frank Sinatra, if you can make it there, you’ll make it anywhere.  Well, Donald Trump made it there and then some.  Can New Yorkers be obnoxious and in your face?  Absolutely but I am dying to get some of that New York Swagger and overconfidence in the White House.  Even if my President has no idea what he’s talking about I want to come away thinking “wow, that guy certainly is sure of himself” rather than “this guy is a bumbling fool”.  There are more people and more money here than anywhere else in the country so why not get someone that has their finger on the pulse of this metropolis?


The Potential First Lady




Anything is a step up from the smug fraud of a First Lady we have now but this is a step up from just about any First Lady ever (honorable mention to Jackie O).  More Melania Trump is good for everybody!

The Potential First Daughters

If having a smokeshow First Lady wasn’t enough how about some First Daughters?

Ivanka Trump




Tiffany Trump




He Was In Home Alone 2

The main reason I want him in the White House is because he is in a movie I’ve seen no less than 75 times.  I will vote for him solely because of this.  Every single time Home Alone 2 is on I watch it and it wasn’t until I got a little older that I realized Donald Trump made a cameo.  So the guy was at the top of the field for real estate, was in an iconic movie and could be President?  Who are we to prevent that type of greatness from reaching it’s peak?


I have absolutely no clue who the President will be.  Don’t particularly care either.  However, I will be paying close attention to Donald Trump’s race toward the finish line because it is going to be glorious, win or lose.


  • DonaldTrumpIsaRichIdiot


Our T-Shirt Store is Closed - Apologies!